Rambling

This is something that has been on my mind for awhile.

One of those things where I don't know if it's just me, or if everyone else feels the same way.

There are a few close people in my life, that I can point out specifically where I feel like there is this constant battle between us.

Their personality is the type where they have to prove they are better than me. At everything. 

Their hair is better.

Their clothes are cuter.

They cook better than me.

They are skinnier.

They have more money.

Their life is more in order than mine is.

Their opinion is right.

My opinion is wrong.

Seriously the list could go on forever!

I know that instinctively all girls do this. I'm guilty of it! Comparing every single thing of every single girl! Why do we have to prove we are better? Doesn't that just make us automatically worse?

Not only is comparing an issue. But when we put another person down, to lift us higher? Some girls really think that is the way it works. I honestly don't get it. Wouldn't it be the opposite? If I help build someone up, it will help build me up too, right?

We all know that one girl who thinks she is the best at everything, right? She is always bragging about how she got this and that. And that because she thinks a certain way, that is the only right way to think. And that everyone needs to be more like her. 

These girls drive you crazy right?

The few girls that are always competing with me the most, are really starting to drive me crazy!

I'm exhuasted of this constant battle.

 I'm still learning how to deal with it. The inner girl instinct in me wants to fight back. I often find myself with holding compliments. When I notice they are wearing a new shirt and yes, they know it's cute and there they are flaunting around you, just waiting for you to say something so they can gloat even more. (sounds really silly but it happens to me a lot)

But, I'm the type of person that will ignore it. I won't compliment them because I don't want their head to get any bigger. I don't want to give them the satisfying feeling that they were searching for in the first place.

How ugly and disgusting of a person does that make me ?

I'm always talking to my husband about this (poor guy) and he always says the same thing.

"Linds, be the bigger person."

I've been trying REALLY hard to be the bigger person. As much as it makes me cringe, I try and compliment as much as I can to these girls. Wow I love those shoes! Oh my gosh these cookies are delicious! You're hair looks amazing! Yes they might get a big head, but maybe, deep down inside they are really hurting and have a low self-esteem. They are just putting on a mask and not showing how they really feel. Maybe they look up to you and that compliment just meant the world to them?

Man, is this even making sense to anyone?

Sorry for the launguage. But can I just say.. AMEN!

I absolutely love Instagram, but with the world these day..... we seem to make everything complicated! Why all the competition!!! 

 Here is a conversation I have had now with at least 3 times with different people. One being the age of 12. 

Anonymous: How many followers do you have?

Me: uh.... I dunno? 

Anonymous: Don't you keep track?

Me: Nope.

Anoymouse: Well I just got 8 new followers today!!

Me: good for you!

Anoymous: Whats your average "likes" you receive on all your posts?

Me: Uh... who has time to worry about that?

Anoymous: How many people comment on your pictures regularly?

Me: I don't keep track...

OH MY GOSH! It drives me completely insane. Why can't I just post what I want, when I want, and not worry about who is going to like it? If they don't like what I post, they can just unfollow me right? and If they don't like what I post, why would I want them following me anyway? It's like we now have a number which "grades us" with how popular each of us are. ugh! It's like high school all over again.

I'm just me. If you like me, great! If not, I don't really care. Because I'm not going to change myself just for you. 

Easier said than done right? As much as I hate it, I even see myself getting sucked down into the crazy cycle. I take a picture and want to post it, but then I second guess myself...

"Well what if people judge me?"

"What if I don't get any likes?"

Lindsie! Stop worrying about that stupid stuff!

I tell myself that a lot during the day. ^

I love this quote.

 Why must we focus on trying to out do each other? When really all we need to do is worry about one person. YOU.